The Cost of Discipleship

Lourdes, France 2025: We entrust the Virgin Mary with our intentions for a life of faithful discipleship.

Standing in our church parking lot, while the misty rain surrounded me, I was overcome with an overwhelming and gut-wrenching grief. I gathered myself enough to slip into our church and fall to my knees before the Blessed Sacrament. "Lord, show me the HOPE," I murmured as tears flowed down my cheeks.

Emotions aside, I know that Jesus is my (our) hope.

"Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in our hope of sharing the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us" (Romans 5:1-5). 

I was literally looking at hope in the face and asking him to show me the hope in this broken world - to show me the light in the darkness.

These past three weeks have felt paralyzing at times. Like most, I have felt the full spectrum of emotions. This week in particular, though, we are reminded of "the cost of discipleship". Last Sunday's gospel theme was, "Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple" (Luke 14:27). Repeatedly throughout scripture, we are told that following Christ is not easy. Everyday it means death of self, and unfortunately, sometimes that death is literally a physical death. However, we know that death does not win! Jesus is our HOPE; he is the light in the darkness.

On Tuesday, "the cost of discipleship" theme continued in our first reading from Colossians (2:6-15). "You were buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through faith in the power of God, who raised him from the dead. And even when you were dead in transgressions and the uncircumcision of your flesh, he brought you to life along with him, having forgiven us all our transgressions..."(Col 2:12-13). 

The next day we were shaken to our core with multiple tragedies that brought us to our knees. And if that was not enough, the readings were a wake up call for all those who do not see the providence of God in these horrific injustices. "Put to death, then, the parts of you that are earthly... Stop lying to one another, since you have taken off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed, for knowledge, in the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcision and uncircumcision, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all and in all" (Col 3:5-11). It does not end there, the gospel reading states, "Raising his eyes toward his disciples Jesus said: 'Blessed are you who are poor, for the Kingdom of God is yours... Blessed are you who are weeping, for you will laugh. Blessed are you when people hate you, and when they exclude and insult you, and denounce your name as evil on account of the Son of Man. Rejoice and leap for joy on that day! Behold, your reward will be great in heaven..." (Full Reading: Luke 6:20-26). 

On Thursday, we heard Jesus tell his disciples, "To you who hear I say, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. To the person who strikes you on one cheek, offer the other one as well... Do to others as you would have them do to you. For if you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them..." (Full Reading: Luke 6:27-38). This is most certainly a hard pill to swallow for most of us, but it is a warning that we must heed and understand in the cost of being a disciple. It is not easy to love someone that does not love us back, and it is certainly difficult to sit there while others bash our very beliefs. It takes great courage and virtue to love those who despise us. Lest we forget, it is not always easy for others to love us.

In Friday's first reading from 1 Timothy, Paul calls himself out by writing, "I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and an arrogant man" (Full Reading: 1 Tim 1:1-2, 12-14). We cannot be good disciples if we are unable to lead others to Jesus Christ through our actions and words. Jesus told his disciples, "'Can a blind person guide a blind person? No disciple is superior to the teacher; but when fully trained, every disciple will be like his teacher'" (Full Reading: Luke 6:39-42). Paul states, "I have been mercifully treated because I acted out of ignorance in my belief. Indeed, the grace of our Lord has been abundant, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus" (1 Tim 1:12-14). It is usually easier to see where others fall short, but at times, we fail to see our own shortcomings or when we fail to love as we ought.

This in itself may seem like a lot to uphold, but we have hope and that hope lies in Jesus Christ. This Sunday our week of "the cost of discipleship" will come to a culmination as we celebrate the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross. It is on the Holy Cross we find our salvation. "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life" (John 3:16). 

In the week leading up to Christ's death and resurrection, we are reminded of our own humanity through the actions of the disciples. They experienced humility in the washing of the feet; joy in the breaking of bread amongst friends; heartbreak and anger with the betrayal of Judas; negligence, violence, and torment in the Garden of Gethsemane; and their abandonment and denial of their teacher and closest friend. We all suffer in making these mistakes. We are no different than Jesus' first disciples. However, the first disciples repented and changed their ways. This does not mean the disciples were perfect moving forward, but they were strengthened together and through Christ. Peter became the rock in which our apostolic Church was built upon. Conversion happened at the foot of the cross, and the apostles sought forgiveness for their disbelief. 

Lest we forget Our Blessed Mother. She was the greatest and most faithful of all the disciples. Her YES and surrender of self gave way to the biggest love story of all time. The Blessed Mother stayed with Jesus unto death, knowing that it was both necessary and would pierce her motherly heart. This week we celebrated the nativity (birth) of the Virgin Mary and her Most Holy Name as Mother of God. On Monday we will commemorate the Feast of Our Lady of Sorrows. This day we are invited to reflect on Mary as our mother, given to us by her son, Jesus Christ. In accepting her as our mother and greatest mediator to her son, we join her in the way of the cross.

The cost in being a disciple of Jesus Christ has an eternal reward. It is in knowing where our hope lies. In the cross, we can look past death. Our lives on earth are short. Embracing our cross is a self emptying act of humility and obedience. And since we have no idea when that life will come to an end, we need to live a life of purpose - bringing as many people as we can with us. The Lord never said following him would be easy, but he did say it would be everlasting.